Month: January 2020 Page 1 of 2

life unplanned

Starting to work on house again. Slowly. Because “fastly” would give me gas. Although I can get that just from eating chocolate with maltitol in it. A supposed sugar alcohol that makes something sugarless. Well, hate to bubble your burst – it doesn’t. In fact on the glycemic index it’s only a few points down from white sugar, raising your blood sugar almost the same. Diabetics beware, maltitol intolerant people – fart away – if you like eating chocolate. There’s a much better solution. Eating Choczero which is made with monk fruit. Zero G.I. Or even making it yourself like my previously mentioned ChocCarl bars in an earlier post.

Sometimes you go through life with blinders on. Hoping that things gets better. At least until you crash the car, burn the house down and fall on a branch while cleaning the dead brush for the upcoming clearance mandated by the city. That did not happen to me. But if it did, I would be crying like a newborn. I would probably curl into a fetal position and wonder if this is what Elvis did as he ate and ate and ate, becoming Mr. Elvis Pudgy. Not to make fun of the guy, he was one of my heroes as a young teenager. I wore tight clothes like him and could never understand why my voice didn’t change until the doc said “you need time to let the testicles drop, might want to get some looser pants…”

Ah, the pains and gains of being young. There were so many moments as I sprouted from a teenager into a man, that life became overwhelming. I never wanted to check out, as some say, I only wanted to grok what was happening. So, I read books, learned to play guitar, was possibly tricked into swallowing some LSD as a teen, and while I’m not admitting that exactly, it was amazing and humbling at the same time. I learned that people are not always what they seem to be. Some are, of course, but the tricksters in life come off normal or somewhat sane, fooling the best of us.

Life unplanned, that’s what everyone born on this planet goes through. Some better than others. Choices are made and carried out while others appear to be forced on us. I watched all three John Wicks the other week. Sadly, I was cheering him on, watching the carnage unfold at rocket speed. Bodies were dropping left and right. I was his biggest cheerleader! The main story has his wife pass after being sick for some time. Two days after she passes – he receives a gift in the form of a puppy from his wife explaining he needed something to take care of after she was gone. Some jerk gang members break into his house later, beat him up, kill his puppy and take his car to teach him a lesson. All because he wouldn’t sell them his car. What the gang members don’t know is John Wick is the boogeyman. An assassin extraordinaire, that was employed when the odds were impossible to carry out. Yes, this movie is over the top. Yet, I found it intensely satisfying, mostly because they killed a defenseless puppy and John Wick, took them out for doing that, one by one.

I have a new puppy now.

Arrived at through a different route of course, no wife passed, no one beat me up or stole my car. Or killed one of my existing puppies. Although my pups will be doing that by themselves shortly as they are well past 18 years or so. I also say that every month  – and every day I wake up with a smile – seeing faces only a squirrel would love… i.e. to run away from as fast as possible in the other direction. Heck sometimes – I’m even scared seeing them in the morning, drooling over my face…ready to lick my skin completely off with their exfoliating tongues.

My new puppy is a challenge. I am learning patience all over again. I have always been forgiving of others. Forgiving of my pups. I lost that right before I first got the Malinois. Why I got the pup is a novel for another day. Suffice it to say, the NSA most likely know the truth. Where is Snowden when you really need him, hmmm? My reason for living, for life, for meaning, has slowly been returning to me. While I got her for a reason, I keep her for love. As much as she taxes my will, my patience, my responsibility, I am filled with hope. That the changes that are taking place within me, will lead to new adventures.

Life unplanned.

P.S. I love this song! God Gave Me You

Warms my little heart…



up north again

Once again out of town for a few days. And guess what I found? Yep. You guys are so freaking smart it blows me away. Mushrooms. Amazing how they just grow when you least expect it. Or should I chalk that up to nature? Always letting things grow in the world. Eh, who would have thunk? Nature, maybe?

Well, I came across what looks like a puffball! Yay! But, upon closer examination was a lookalike. Puffballs have no stems and when I turned this one over before slicing down the middle, yep, you are correct, a stem. And gills. So eating this one would be the demise of Carl Jasper. And I have plenty of other ways to expire before succumbing to a lookalike. Geesh.

Then I found this group of shrooms, all huddled together. Haven’t identified them as of yet, but they sure are cuties! I could just snuggle up to them. Or not. Still deciding.

And of course this post wouldn’t be complete without a few photos of this beautiful property I was staying at.

The atmosphere of the place is intoxicating. When I finally relax and catch my breath there will be more posts coming up! Rules you know.




watches and chocolate

I’m addicted. Let’s take that word apart to discover the hidden meanings contained inside. “ADD” of course we all recognize that word. “Attention Deficit Disorder”.  The DSM-5 which is the bible of psychiatric disorders is no longer using this term. It’s now ADHD or “attention deficit hyperactivity disorder”.  Which of course doesn’t work when inserted thus – “adhdicted”. I may not be a great speller but the above sure is wrong as is milking nuts. However, who decided to call nuts that have been pulverized in a blender and strained “milk”? Geesh. But that’s another story for another day.

And where do all the plastic bags go that the nuts come in? Hmmm? Oh, look, a plane just went by. At one time I thought we were being subjected to chemicals being dropped from government planes to experiment on the unsuspecting populace below. Chemtrails. Nasty stuff. I have a crystal on my desk at home that keeps me safe. Eh, maybe not. If you believe in that sort of stuff. I like mushroom coffee. A lot. Sometimes I make it without coffee! Cool huh?

Anyways, let’s take the second part of the word “ic”. That’s easy to interpret. It’s either integrated circuit which is an electronic chip used in manufacturing TV’s, computers etc…or it means “ewww” your boogers are hanging from the edge of your nose! One time, when I was out of town, I lost my phone. I think there may have been sun spots involved.

Ok, back to the last part of the word. “Ted”. Which is short for Teddy Bear. I have those. They were on my dresser until I remodeled recently. Now they’re in a box. Well, not a box, a storage container. Like the kind you get from Home Depot etc. It has a yellow top. Pretty cool looking.

Now that I’m looking at the title of this post, I’m wondering where that came from? I have a watch, you know the kind that pretends to check your blood pressure etc? And I’ve eaten chocolate. Many times in fact. Oh, the mailman is here! Oops, I slipped up! MAIL PERSON. Like fer sure, we are in PCFornia after all. (Politically Correct)

Lunchtime! Yeah. Thanks for checking in with me on the blog. I just got a call from my therapist who is telling me I broke something in the DSM-5. He said they’re thinking of adding a new term to the DSM-5. “CARL BRAIN SYNDROME” or CBS. Which would be weird because I use to watch shows on CBS when I was younger. Now they charge for a few new shows so I stopped watching.

Hope I don’t have to pay for breaking the new book…gotta run!

another sad holiday by the same agency that enabled it…

MLK. Most know those initials as Martin Luther King. Who, we know, was shot on April 4, 1968 and died an hour later at a hospital. The events surrounding his death in the years to come, would be filled with conspiracy theories and a changing narrative, obscuring the actual moment for decades to come.

I was about 12 years old at the time. While it didn’t have the same impact on me at that age, I have grown into someone who researches and draws my own conclusions to historical “facts”. For obvious reasons, such as: just a kid, president of service club (was I now a target from my fellow elementary peers? Would I be “eliminated” as well?) Yep. Being a kid had some advantages. The world revolves around us. There is very little else except the sense of self. So it comes as no surprise decades later that I understand more about how our government operates.

Was there a conspiracy? Did MLK get the cut from life because popular opinion was turning against the wars we were fighting? Well, here’s a cut and paste for ya..

Pepper said King was killed because of his opposition to the war and his planned“poor people’s march” on Washington. Those activities angered big-money defense contractors and threatened a redistribution of wealth in America, he said.

King planned to assemble thousands of protesters at a tent city in Washington and those in power “were afraid that mob would overrun the capital,” Pepper said.

The order to kill King, Pepper said, came from the head of organized crime in New Orleans to a Memphis produce dealer who got Jowers to handle the payoff and murder weapon. An Army sniper squad was in place to shoot King if the Mafia hit failed, Pepper said

A jury awarded the King family $100 after they found there was a massive conspiracy by our government and other groups to assassinate MLK. Does this make it true? Nah. On the flip side, does this make it false? Nah. But until the juries findings are disproved, history will always find in a small footnote in legal documents, that MLK’s assassination was the result of a conspiracy with our government.

And we continue to accept that the government has our back, protects our citizens, never imposing it’s might for the wrong reasons. Could “government protection” be an oxymoron like “open secret” or “liquid gas”?

I don’t know what happened that fateful day. Is the world better off without MLK in it? His death has made history around on our planet and brought to life a grass roots effort to break down the walls of ignorance. On the other hand, how much more would he have accomplished, allowed to live his life and spread his truth? We will never know. But anytime someone is shot over their beliefs, the world becomes smaller.

We know that around the globe, governments kill their citizens for not agreeing with the policies that are being imposed on them. Is this what America has to look forward too as well? I hope not. For now, I am grateful there was a person called MLK, with hopes and dreams that all could identify with. I know in my heart we can overcome the ignorance and bullying our government imposes on us. Just electing the right people to office can make a small difference that slowly takes hold and becomes the law of the land.

Am I political? Nah. I’m a musician first and foremost, an electronic tinkerer second and a critter enjoyer third. So, how do I know we’ll eventually prevail?

Because once again, I have faith.


The other day I received a text.

what the hay? to which I replied:

hay is for horses the reply I got was:

and bunnies.”

What was accomplished with the above text conversation? Nothing? Anything? I think the first text was meant to establish a connection after not speaking for quite some time. While the above may work for some people, it doesn’t work for me. If you’re planning on re-establishing some dialog with me, than something better than “what the hay” is something worth considering.

The above text makes me the person – that is now given the task of a meaningful interaction. I become the one to reestablish communication. The person sending the somewhat innocent text “what the hay?”, has transferred the bulk of the work over to the person receiving the text. Doesn’t quite seem like a genuine way to get the ball rolling again.

Perhaps something more along the lines of “What is going on with you? I know it’s been awhile but I was thinking about you and the last time we talked we were left hanging like a dangling participle.”

That I can respond to. Heck, sometimes dangling participles can be a hoot! Example:

Driving like a maniac, the fish was hit and killed.

This makes it seem like the fish was driving. Fixed it would read thus:

Driving like a maniac, Edgar hit and killed a fish

While no animals were harmed during the above theoretical examples, there is a very real possibility that both parties could be misunderstood. Communication becomes less than satisfactory, and ideas, along with thoughts can become mangled, sometimes beyond recognition. And for the record, Edgar and I are no longer friends since hitting the fish. Heck, I brake for fish and crustaceans!

The many ways in which a conversation can be misinterpreted are endless. Taking time to reach out, with a willingness to explain what you are saying, texting or even emailing someone, can be the difference between a connecting relationship or one that flounders, killed dead, like the fish above.

Moral of the story? It’s tough being a fish on a highway.


history repeats itself…again

I know where socks go. When you’re missing one from a pair. Yep. I used to think that either my washing machine had a builtin teleportation device or another theory I had, was a sock eater. Invisible creatures sharing the planet with us that lived off socks and only socks.

Today, I walked outside to find some of my socks scattered and buried in the backyard. I was overjoyed that they had been returned from planet x. Or the 4th dimension called “Quirbyth”.

Somehow, I wasn’t buying this sudden return since they looked and seemed fresh, almost new in appearance. Right at that moment, faster than I could focus, lighting like in speed, a sock went dashing by. Not by itself of course, as socks have no feet until you put them on.

My sock was being held by my new monster and her baby teeth. My puppy. My Belgium Malinois. The sock stealer. Yep. She’s going to jail soon. Although this reminded me of another pup I had years ago. Here’s a post and picture from the evil sock stealer taken from circa 12.30.2004:

A dark object, just lying in the middle of the floor. A dark object that once use to be bright white. Yes, another sock has been recovered. My girl pup has developed an affinity for my socks. She steals them when I’m not looking then buries them – why? Only her tortured mind knows for sure. What does a pup think? Dream? I can only imagine the thoughts and images as she silently plunders my socks, buries them outside in the mud.

my favorite dog

The one above is blowing a raspberry at me with a devil may care attitude about her criminal behavior. The other below is using an angelic expression of innocence “who me?” Notice the similarity? Yep. Evil. Sinister, calculating. Sock stealers.


Love Like There’s No Tomorrow

So, this is a repost kinda. From the old site. I really like this song. Hope you do as well…

Right now gonna take you in my arms
Hold you closer and tighter than I ever have
I’m gonna say all the things that I thought could wait
Now I realize that later could be a little too late

Baby let’s love like there’s no tomorrow
Live for every moment, laugh at least a little everyday
If we see the sun rise in the morning, is impossible to say
So let’s love
(Let’s love)
Like there’s no tomorrow
(No tomorrow)

From now on every time we kiss
It’s gonna mean so much more when I touch your lips
When I give myself to you baby I won’t hold nothin’ back
‘Cause there’s nothin’ I wouldn’t give to make every minute last

Baby let’s love like there’s no tomorrow
Live for every moment, laugh at least a little everyday
If we see the sun rise in the morning, is impossible to say
So let’s love
(Lets tomorrow)
Like there’s no tomorrow
(No tomorrow)

Baby let’s love like there’s no tomorrow
Live for every moment laugh at least a little everyday
(Every moment)
If we see the sun rise in the morning, is impossible to say
So let’s love
(Baby let’s love)
Like there’s no tomorrow
(No tomorrow)

Oh baby let’s love
(Lets love)
Like there’s no tomorrow
(No tomorrow)

the evening forecast

We all know about weather forecasts. We’ve read astrological ones. Stock market predications and crop forecasts. Betting predictions on just about everything! The list continues and never seems to stop. But I have a brand new forecast. One that has been attempted before, no doubt, just never before with the precision and dedication it deserves.

The Evening Forecast

Yep. Such a seemingly simple idea and so amazingly brilliant, I can hear the rush to jump on this band wagon. Forget all the forecasts above, even the ones not mentioned. THIS forecast is the only one you will ever need.

Why? How can The Evening Forecast be so powerful and mysterious, emotional and foretelling, satisfying and nurturing? How can this one forecast be so wonderful as to replace all others? What gives power to this forecast to replace some that have been going for years if not centuries?

Today I have read the money markets, the horoscopes for capricorns, the weather predictions for the US and the world. And yet they all pale in comparison to the evening forecast. The only one you’ll ever need. And how does the Evening Forecast work? What’s so darn special about it? I’ll tell you…but first send $29.95 to the address listed in this post…(nah, just had to throw that one in…smile)

Instead of continuing into the ethereal network of the universe, I’ll give you today’s evening forecast, something for you to chew on.

Eat homemade sauerkraut.

The beauty of that is you can also eat some tomorrow evening and the next. You can look back and see that you’ve eaten some in the past. You now have the past, present and future pretty much covered! Tomorrows forecast? The same! Yes. I know, brilliant of course. Simplicity in it’s finest. Just one of the many hats I wear. Doing my job.

Tonights forecast is?

the invention of lying

Another movie review??? YAY! And you thought this year was going to be boring. In fact, I bet you’ve already forgotten that this is the year of opportunity.  Shall we begin, hmmm?

I stumbled across this while clicking through the endless shows offered up by netflix. I get overwhelmed with the choices there are so many. And then my arrow stopped on “The Invention of Lying” accidentally. You’re thinking “how does one accidentally stop on a selection in netflix?”

Quite easily actually. For some reason, my remote skips categories and selections just about every time I use it. When I hit the scroll down I end up two categories down instead of one. When I scroll choices it can skip 2-3 ahead. And wouldn’t you know it, this time it landed on the above.

Wanting to be a little more adventurous in the year of opportunity, I clicked on it thinking, why not? I was hooked once I saw it starred Jennifer Garner and Ricky Gervais. And the guest star and supporting actor list, amazing: Philip Seymour Hoffman, Jason Bateman, Tina Fey, Rob Lowe, Jeffrey Tambor, Louis C.K., Edward Norton are among some of the notables.

Basic Premise: A world in which there is absolutely no word for “Lying”. No one lies. Everyone tells the truth no matter how harsh or sweet. In short there is no room for anything but the truth. While it does get over the top in some aspects such as: do they really need to have someone tell another person they’re ugly? Or fat? Or a loser? Not really. And yet they do. I believe it’s more to get the point across that no one ever lies. The concept just doesn’t exist in this hypothetical world.

The movie starts with the lead character “Mark” (Ricky) going on a date with Anna (Jennifer). When she answers the door looking flustered she tells him he’s early and she was masturbating. He responds by saying it makes him think of her vagina. She tells him he’s has a stub nose and is short and fat. And the dialog continues. Sometimes very clever and others it has that space filling effect.

There’s a wonderfully comic scene with Philip Seymour Hoffman as a bartender and Louis C.K. as his friend when “Mark” has first discovered his superpower. Just fun to watch!

I almost didn’t continue watching which would have been a shame as the ending was extremely meaningful and heartwarming. When Mark finally realizes he can do something no one else in the world can do (lie), he starts using this superpower for good and to get rich as well. The one person he never uses it on? Anna. Who he’s been in love with for a very long time from afar. Fast becoming friends, she snubs him because he’s short and fat and not good genetic material for offspring. And yet, Mark can’t get enough of her. He still has integrity though and wants her to love him for who he is, not his DNA, so he abstains from using his newfound power of Lying on her.

I loved this movie, especially the ending. Warmed my little heart through and through.

it’s picture time…yay!

On a hike the other day, there was an interesting bush that had these strawberry like fruits dangling. Of course I had to know what it was called.

Arbutus Unedo” (< – click for more info)

Unedo meaning “I ate one time”. apparently it’s not that tasty and unlike strawberries where you can eat a pound in 5 minutes, these would take a day or so. They are a very hardy bush and I’m thinking of planting some here. Other things to do first though…


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